Blood of the Rainbow Page 8

  I spoke to Granddad about my dream and about her, and he said what visited my dream was her inner spirit. The part of her that was eternal and knew no boundaries. I explained how, at first she was a little girl, about ten years old and then she changed to someone closer to my age. He said that was because she was coming to me from my future.

  He said, in my future, she already knew about me. She also knew exactly when and where I would find her. He said, because I hadn’t met her yet, her inner spirit was bound to her body and through her dreams was the only way she could communicate with me.

  He said, the girl herself, didn’t know any of this because our inner spirits, aren’t allowed to reveal future events to its physical self. We’re only allowed to share that information with others connected and concerned with the event. He also said, she probably would never tell me her name – she wasn’t supposed to.

  When I told him she didn’t appear to be one of our people, he said that was why she was so eager to reveal things in my dreams, because she probably couldn’t see the visions as I did, unless she had the gene from our people. He said because I was not able to affect her dreams as she did mine, should I choose a different direction; I could not alert her so that she would no longer feel the need to communicate with me in my dreams. Because I was pure Navajo, and of royal blood, I alone possessed the power to end my visions if I willed it. If I chose another mate, I could stop her from visiting my dreams. I would never do that! I don’t want another mate. I want her! No one else!

  I guess I’ll just have to be content to wait for her to visit my dreams instead of me being able to visit hers. I’m not sure I believe the stories he told me, but if they are true and she does exist somewhere other than in my dreams, and if she’s out there waiting for me to find her, I will find her. If it takes the rest of my life and I have to follow her to the ends of the Earth, I will find her. I’ve never felt so strongly compelled about anything before. I know this is something I have to do – no matter what!’

  Entry Two, Second Dream. The girl is about 13 years old:

  ‘It’s been a few years since I dreamed of the girl. I wasn’t really expecting to ever dream of her again, but last night, I did. She now looks to be around twelve or thirteen, and she’s at some kind of party, maybe her birthday party. She’s opening gifts and eating cake, and she seems happy. I’m glad for that. I want her to be happy – even if it’s without me.

  She seems to be able to bring me in her dreams as both a contributor and an observer. I’m watching her now. I don’t think she knows I’m here because she hasn’t acknowledged me yet.

  A lady, perhaps a sister or an Aunt has given her a guitar as a present. She must have wanted it badly. If I could have been with her, I would have given it to her long ago, if I knew she wanted one. I would give her the moon if she asked for it.

  She’s looked up and seen that I’m here. She’s walked away from her friends and family, and now she’s moving toward me. She’s smiling.

  “It’s so good to see you again,” she said, hugging me. “I’ve missed you.” She gave me a strange look. “You haven’t been thinking about me lately, have you? You’ve been thinking about someone else, another girl named Eve.” Why, I don’t know, but I felt bad, almost guilty as if I’d cheated on her.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I thought you were just a silly dream brought on by my Granddad’s old stories.”

  She smiled and held up her hand. “It’s all right. I don’t mind. You’re older. Your life is moving at a faster pace, our paths have not crossed in the waking world. I don’t expect you to devote yourself to a dream. You shouldn’t feel guilty for loving someone, anyone. I know it’s just temporary, and if you change your mind about me, you will let me know. I don’t expect you to think of nothing but me. Live your life. Enjoy yourself; I know you will find me when the time is right. I’ve got a few more years of growing to do.

  I was eager to know. “When will you come to me again?” I asked.

  She smiled. “Oh, I’ll be around. Unless you start thinking about me, or you need me, I probably won’t bother you again until there’s an important event in my life. Maybe on my sixteenth birthday. Would you like to share that with me as you have my thirteenth birthday?”

  “Yes, I would,” I said. “I would rather have you with me all the time. It’s lonely without you.”

  “Then I’ll spend my sweet sixteenth birthday with you. I’ve gotta go now.”

  “What? No! Wait! Must you go so soon? You’ve just got here. What’s your name? The last time you visited me, you didn’t tell me your name.”

  She sighed, “No,” she said. “I’m not allowed to tell you that, nor are you allowed to tell me yours. We will know that, only when we meet in the waking world.”

  Mist started to gather around us. She blew me a kiss. I blinked, and she was gone.

  This is driving me nuts. Here am I, ready to ask Eve to be my wife, and now this. Perfect timing, dreamgirl. This is going beyond ridiculous. They’re nothing but old stories! They’re just dreams. Why can’t I get her off my mind? I’m not going to be guided by a figment of my imagination. I know what I want. I want Eve, and I’m going to marry her too. The girl in my dreams is probably her, although I don’t understand why her hair is dark in my dreams, and Eve’s is golden.’

  Those last few words hurt Sara. She realized how close Jared came to choosing someone else. What if she wasn’t who he thought she was? Did she have the right to try and fill somebody else’s shoes? Someone by fate that Jared was destined to spend his life with?

  Entry Three. The girl is 16 years old:

  ‘I know the girl in my dreams is not just a figment of my imagination. She said she would come to me again when she was sixteen, and I have counted off the years, and they match. I also know she spoke truthfully when she said Eve was temporary. I asked her to marry me, and she said no. I offered to move back to Australia with her, but she said she didn’t want to get serious. I can’t take this anymore. I’m so confused. I have to find a way to end this pain. I’m leaving in the morning. I can’t stand this ache. Does no one love me? Is there no one out there for me?

  That was the last thing on my mind as I closed my eyes. It was nice to sleep out under the open sky. I didn’t even bother trying to find a hotel. I didn’t want to be around people. Almost immediately, as sleep took me away, she was there, answering the question for me.

  “Yes, someone loves you. I do and I always will. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You knew she was only going to be with you for a while – I told you that. Don’t you remember? You know she’s not right for you.”

  “You’re back!” I exclaimed. I was so glad to see her. I hugged her and held her in my arms, and before I realized what I was doing, I kissed her. I didn’t really expect to be able to feel her but I did. Her lips were warm and moist, real. Her body was warm and solid against mine. She kissed me back.

  “I thought I’d lost you,” I said.

  She shook her head and smiled, “Never! As long as this body breathes, I’m yours. And even when life no longer lives on this plane, I will still love you and wait for you to join me, should I go first. I will never leave you unless you tell me to go. You’re closer to me now. Look for Cross Lake. Follow the green and purple tunnel. Go there and wait for me. I still have a few more years before I’m with you. Please, try and be patient. I’m as anxious to be with you as you are to be with me.”

  “How old are you?”

  She laughed, “Don’t you believe anything I tell you? Think about when I said I would visit you again. Don’t be deceived. Others will cloud your path as they have before. The closer you get to me, the fewer clues I’m allowed to give you. Everything must be done according to your choosing.” She started to pull away from me and I could feel her fading.

  “You’re leaving again, aren’t you?” I said. She nodded her head and started to cry. “I wish I could be with you now,” I said, trying to hold on to her but she was losing tangibility
.

  “I know. I wish I could be with you now too. Don’t be troubled. What you see is only for now and not for the future. He will not last, just as Eve did not last. We will be together soon. Remember,” she said with a wave goodbye, “Patience is a virtue.” Then she was gone again.’

  Entry Four. Not Part of My Dreamgirl – Just an update on my life leading up to what I hope will be to find her.

  ‘I found the place she told me to, Cross Lake. It took a while but thanks to the Internet, I was successful. At least I hope I have the right one! There were several entries, but knowing how this thing worked, I chose the first one. Shreveport Louisiana.

  I’ve applied for a job at the hospital as an Emergency doctor. I made friends with a genetic engineer named Gary Browne. He runs the research department of a place called D’Netics, over near LSU-Med. He’s a freaking genius when it comes to DNA and gene therapy. Someday, that guy is going to make history – I can just feel it.

  I spent the next couple of weeks looking for a place to live. I’ve got my eye on a big old plantation house that Gary told me about. It’s kind of out of my reach right now. The darn thing is tied up in some kind of inheritance dispute but the old lady is at death’s door. Maybe it will be up for sale soon. Hopefully her son won’t want the house then. I’ll bide my time and hope. I don’t know why I feel so drawn to this place, but I have a feeling this is where I should be. Maybe it has something to do with her, my dreamgirl. I really miss her.

  A couple more weeks have passed and I got the job I wanted and the salary was to die for. Apparently, it has something to do with the fact I’m Navajo. Funny, I never thought me being what I am would work to my advantage but apparently, I’m a minority. Hey, I can live with that. I can really bring ‘Raging Storm’ out now and I can start putting some money away for my house. I will have it! My dreamgirl still hasn’t shown up – I’m beginning to think she’s never coming again, but I’m still hopeful. I have so many things I want to share with her.

  I’ve been drawing sketches of my dreams. Some are a little fuzzy and could use a little clarity, but I’ve drawn them the way I saw them. It seems, the clearer my dreams are, the easier it is for me to sketch them. I wonder if they will help me convince her she’s for me when I find her. I want her to see my secret place. I would never show it to another living soul. That’s my place, our place, just ours!

  Well, I’ve got one hell of a country band going. Steve and Carl’s neighbor, Lucy Ripley, has joined the band. She’s hot but she’s not my type. I don’t like blondes anymore. I guess I’m just doomed to live the rest of my life without finding my dreamgirl. At least I’m staying busy.’

  Entry Five: Wisteria Hall

  ‘Oh man, can my luck get any better. Ok, I know I’m a doctor, and I’m supposed to live for the preservation of life but the passing of this life has given me another piece of my dream. Thanks to Gary Browne, and his cousin Donna Rigden, Wisteria Hall is mine!

  Just got a good look at the inside of the house and the rest of the grounds. This is not going to be easy but I’m going to enjoy it. I’ve drawn up all the plans, hired the crews and work has begun. Each thing I do here, reminds me more of her, my dreamgirl. I can’t wait to show it to her. I can’t wait to share it with her.

  Well, it took almost a year, but it’s done. I thought the house was my crowning glory, now I have a fully equipped recording studio out back. The band really enjoys working here and so do I.

  Lucy said something about her niece coming to live with her when school was out this year. I wonder what she’ll be like. Maybe I can spend some time with her. I’m really getting lonely. I’ve been spending all this time on the Hall, and now that it’s finished, I don’t have anything to do with my time. I need something to do.

  Kim at work has been giving me the eye. And then there’s Donna, Gary Browne’s cousin. Donna is a nice girl and all, and she does look a lot like the girl in my dreams, but then too much doesn’t fit. I appreciate Donna’s help in securing Wisteria Hall for me. I think she kind of likes me too, but, what kind of relationship could we have, if I’m still in love with my dreams?

  Steve tells me I should live a little. He says I’ve been using this mysterious dream to keep me from getting on with my life. Sometimes, late at night, when I’m lying awake and can’t sleep, I wonder if he might be right. Maybe I should give Donna a chance, but then again, maybe not. It wouldn’t be fair to have her assume we might have some kind of future together when there’s another woman on my mind. No! I’ve held an angel in my arms and after that, nothing can compare. I want my dreamgirl! She still hasn’t come again, but then she said she wouldn’t. I guess I should have believed her but I want her with me. I desperately need her. There’s a missing part of me, and because of all the clues she’s given me, I’ll know when I’ve found her. Granddad, I’ll find that missing part – the other half of me. I wish I had her now - guess I’m not being so patient.’

  Entry Six – She’s here! She’s here! She’s here!

  ‘I had given up the idea of having my dreamgirl with me. I had completely put her out of my conscious mind. Well, maybe not completely. I guess it’s a good thing my sub-conscious mind held onto her because at last, I have beheld her and now I know her name. It’s Sara Foster. She’s everything and more than the girl in my dreams. She is the girl in my dreams; I can feel it. When she stands next to me, it’s as if a missing piece of me has come home. The touch of her hand in mine sends chills down my spine.

  I was across the street at Steve and Carl’s, just chilling when a strange car pulled in behind Lucy’s. I watched her get out. I wondered who she was. She’s apparently come to stay with Lucy and she had a lot of what looked like heavy luggage so I thought I would be a gentleman and help them out.

  Sara was bent over, digging deep in the trunk of her car, trying to retrieve some of her books. I noticed she had long dark brown silky hair. Could it be her? Come on Jared, get it together, you’re losing it again. Just do what you came to do. Help them get the stuff in, say hello and get on with life. I stood there, watching her, something terribly familiar about her. “You look like you could use a hand,” I said, innocently.

  She let out a little yelp and banged her head on the top of the trunk lid. I don’t like to brag, but I think she might have been dazzled by what she saw when she looked up at me. It was either my looks or the fact that she saw the blood on her hand when she touched her head, because she looked like she was going to faint. “Easy there! Are you all right?” I asked, helping her to stand up.

  Her eyes met mine and I thought I was going to lose it. I wanted to take her into my arms and never let her go. It was all I could do to dress her wound. It wasn’t as bad as it looked. I decided she wouldn’t need stitches. Then, feeling desperate for some reason to keep her with me, I asked her to go for a walk and she accepted. She didn’t pull away when I took her hand as we crossed the street. Her hand in mine felt so natural. Almost as natural as breathing. How am I ever going to make myself leave her, but I have to. She told me I would have to take it slow. I really am trying to.

  I’m not going to write anything else in here, because I feel this journey has met its end. And, even if it hasn’t, and even if Sara may not be the girl in my dreams, she’s enough for me, everything fits. The girl in my dreams will just have to find someone else. I’ve found what I’m looking for and I’m going after it!’

  Jared loves Sara! Forever!

  Sara read the last few lines again.

  ‘I’m not going to write anything else in here, because I feel like this journey has met its end. And, even if it hasn’t, and even if Sara may not be the girl in my dreams, she’s enough for me, everything fits. The girl in my dreams will just have to find someone else. I’ve found what I’m looking for and I’m going after it!’

  Sara wiped the tears from her eyes and ran her fingers over the last written words as she read them again.

  ‘Jared loves Sara! Forever!’

  Slowly
, Sara closed the diary and sat on the side of her bed. Her head filled with so many confusing thoughts that she couldn’t think straight. How am I supposed to take this? Who are Gary Browne and Donna Rigden? If they and Jared are friends, why hasn’t he introduced us – especially Donna? He seems to have a soft spot for her. What if…?

  Sara had always believed in love at first sight but, this went beyond that, far beyond it. This was even beyond scary. It didn’t occur in the real world, not in her world. Sara’s world was filled with pain, loss and disappointment. This couldn’t be meant for me. “What should I do?” she mused. “Should I just let things stay the way they are? If Jared’s dreamgirl were Kim or Donna, obviously he hadn’t gave either of them a chance. I wonder….”

  Sara booted her laptop. Since she didn’t have a last name for Kim, she searched for Donna Rigden with reference to Gary Browne and D’Netics. She started the search and waited. There were several references to Gary Browne and D’Netics, but only one for Donna Rigden. Sara truly wasn’t that interested in what Donna had done or accomplished. She was searching for a picture, and she found one. Sara’s mouth gaped. To the side of an article about genetic research and heart disease was a smiling face much like Sara’s. She narrowed her eyes as a pang of jealously shot through her, then sadness, guilt, regret. “Oh God! This is hard. Am I being selfish? What certainty do I have that it’s her? This isn’t fair. I found him first. Don’t I deserve happiness?”

  Sara thought she’d been in love before, but this wasn’t how it had felt. She was so confused. She wanted Jared, that was a fact, but could she be so selfish as to try and fill shoes that were never meant for her to wear? Could she live with the fact, that she might be preventing Donna or someone else from getting what truly was never Sara’s? Could she be strong, and love Jared enough to let him go? To let him be with the one he was destined to be with?

  ------------

  Sara stood, and ran her hand through her hair, pacing back and forth, the short distance from her bed to the opposite wall. She knew Jared would expect some kind of response when she saw him again. But, when would she see him again? Sara glanced at her watch. She’d been reading his diary for the last hour, and it seem like she had only just opened the book. Where did time go?